Oh glorious Father! My sustainer, my fortress, my everlasting hope! How toilsome, to face the swiftly passing days as they relentlessly crash against the starboard side of this vessel called life, pushing me this way and that. There is but one bearing that I wish to pursue! One! May your mighty outstretched arms shield the waves and with your breath may you carry my sails through the storms of the raging sea! How wearisome it is to battle constantly, a foe that never tires, that never slumbers. Ever violent he is, attacking the mind, the body, and the spirit… and without a shred of mercy. How much easier the fight O Lord, if I could just relinquish the gift of sight, the gift of feeling and sensations, and the gifts of deep pondering and heartfelt emotions. Thus, leaving the enemy with no kinks left in my armor to penetrate through as he seeks to gravely wound my soul. Had I not been blessed with such gifts, they would not have also been my downfall, causing me to fall away from you Lord, my first love. And so I battle the hordes of deceit, selfishness, pain, sorrows, and worries. Oh how much easier it would be to surrender these gifts, so that I may not be distracted by the sights, lead away by my feelings, and so I could be simple in thought as to be forced only one choice of thinking and action… to love you Lord with all of my being! Oh how in complete despair my soul screams out in horrendous agony, to be eternally bonded to the fullness of your indescribable love without reservation… a love like no other. How ignorant of me though, to miss the magnificent beauty of the gift of freely choosing to love, and by emphasizing such beauty by being given the choice to love through the crashing waves, through the storms of life, and through battling the merciless hordes of the enemy. Is not love given wings to soar, when contrasted against perils of life and found to be triumphant… because of the choice to love? If this be so Father, then let me keep my eyes, let me keep my body, and my spirit… and for a thousand years let me live, that I may tirelessly fight and display my love for you! Send me off into the front lines of the battlefield, that I may fight for you until every ounce of my affection for you, every single drop, has been spilled from my body… poured out for you as your Son has so selflessly and sacrificially done for me first. Not because I have to O Lord… but because I choose to. Because I choose to… love you.
Psalm 63:1-3 – You, God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory. Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.
Psalm 63:7-8 – Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.
John 3:16 – For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.
The Hammer and Chisel 